Already got asked if we're dating
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize