I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize