I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
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