DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Come on in and take your pants off
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