I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
