hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
