One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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