We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
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I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
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I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship