Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves