At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Do vagina's smell?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
