I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
