i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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