Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Randomize