porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
