left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
i think i scared a bird with my dick
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
