even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
