Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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