Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
We need to get me chipped asap
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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