Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize