I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
