Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
