He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
