He asked to "fluff my boner.."
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
