yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
This house was built for laser tag.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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