So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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