pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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