my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Little spoons don't ask big questions
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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