i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Randomize
