There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
