the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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