Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
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