I wish life had little blips of pornography
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
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