Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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