You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
