I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
How external is "for external use only"?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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