He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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