I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
