It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
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