it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
