Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
