My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
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