drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
