He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize