well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME