just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Just puked most of my soul out..
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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