Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
