grandma shit on top of the toilet
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize