I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I am naked and annoyed.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
