3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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