But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
