pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize